My Commitment

So the week after I made a commitment to be more faithful with my blog-writing, my computer monitor died. Here I am anyway using Shelby's work computer to post this week's entry. See how dedicated I am?

We made it through the first week of school relatively intact. There is a small busing issue that I am not pleased about. In order to save money, Silver Trail has doubled up with the high school for transportation. The result is a 6:50 pick-up time for my FIVE AND SIX YEAR-OLD! We live eight miles from the school so driving them myself is not an affordable option. No worries though, I have already raised a stink and apparently I am not alone in my concerns. Hopefully it will be peacefully resolved. Of course, that is up to them.

Lilly has every-other-day, all-day kindergarten, a so today was only her third day of school. Not surprisingly, she is a whole different student than Rachel. Every school day with Rachel last year I would get mountains of worksheets, newsletters, and various other little things. With the exception of the first day, I have yet to see a single shred of evidence that Lilly does anything in kindergarten at all. I ask her how her day was, and she seems unsure. I ask her what she did all day and she tells me "I don't know." If you do not know Lilly like I do, you may assume she has a dud for a teacher. But I know my little girl and she is a space cadet. I would not be surprised if she has a stack of papers in her take-home folder (which I also have yet to see, even though I was told it exists) that she keeps forgetting to bring home. I would be more upset and concerned about her spaciness except I can only blame myself. That girl got a strong dose of my genes, I'm afraid. One thing she has that I do not is a great fashion sense. On the second day of school Lilly had a specific outfit in mind. She wanted to wear her new striped shirt (I'm talking bold colors here. The kind of shirt that will cause seizures if you look at it too long) along with black leggings and a blue floral skirt. I tried to talk her out of it but she insisted. I decided that my motives for wanting her to change were vain and self-serving, so I begrudgingly gave in. She put the outfit on the next morning, and you would not believe how cute it was! Probably wouldn't win any fashion awards, but the outfit really did work.

Sending my kids off in the world is emotionally upsetting to me. Every time I send them on that bus I lose control of their well-being. Don't get me wrong, they have fabulous adults out there to help them through the day. But those adults have the best interest of the students as a whole in mind. I don't care a lick about the other students. My number one concern are my precious girls. Rachel came home upset on the second day of school. With much prodding she finally told me her problem. There is a strict rule about pushing in chairs in her class, and when she got up to get a drink, she forgot to push hers in. She said when she came back it was gone. When she asked her teacher, she was told it must have run away. She felt embarrassed, and was heartbroken. I had to suppress my anger long enough to come to the conclusion that the teacher had her reasons, and was not out to get my girl. Rachel was totally over it by the next day, and loves her teacher to death. So no real tragedy here, but it has put me on guard with both my girls.

I have had two full days where it has only been Carson, Emmy, and me at home. Emmy sleeps much of the time, and does not say much. The result is a feeling of a lot of one-on-one time with Carson. I have loved it! Carson and I never ever ever get to spend time together just the two of us. I will say he has a much stronger personality when his sisters are not here. He actually has an opinion on things, and he makes that opinion known! I love it though. One opinionated three-year-old is still easier than two opinionated big girls, an easy-going little boy, and a VERY opinionated one-year-old. While I am loving the time together, I think Carson has been a little bored. On Monday he headed for the bus stop without me about three hours too early. I asked him where he was going and he said very firmly "To get Rachel and Lilly." It was all I could do to convince him to wait. Today while we were running errands, his mood changed noticeably. He became much more subdued as he crossed his arms and dropped his head. I asked him what was wrong and he said "I miss Rachel and Lilly." So sad!

Emilia has got to be my worst traveler so far. I cannot get in the car with her without hearing her pterodactyl screech. I thought moving her to a forward facing seat would help keep her brain occupied. All it has done is helped her create eye contact with everyone while she complains. Still I love her. She voluntarily gives me kisses all the time, which makes my whole world go around. She is just learning how to go down the stairs. It is inevitable that every baby will fall at least once when mastering this fete. Emmy's fall was yesterday. Remember, the bottom of our stairs is a stone landing. She was of course upset. I trotted down and brushed her off, and cuddled her a little and the whole thing was over. Now contrast that with the time Rachel rolled off the couch onto a soft carpeted floor when she was a baby. I was sure I had given her brain-damage. Luckily I was on the phone with a veteran mother at the time who told me she was probably just fine. I went ahead and forewent the 911 call, but I was shaky and panicked. I spend the rest of the day watching for signs of a concussion. First babies, you know.

First Day of School!

I have not blogged since July 6th? For the one or two people who read this blog faithfully I apologize. As I have said in the last couple of posts, we have been having way too much summer fun! Laundry has piled up, the house is in need of some serious tlc, and we have all been going to bed far too late and sleeping in way too long. Sadly summer fun is no more as of yesterday. Rachel started first grade yesterday, and my little Lilly began her first day of kindergarten this morning. Kuna school district, the fate of my little children is now in your hands. At least Monday through Friday from 8am until 2:30. Treat them well, they are special little beings!

I only get slightly choked up when I think about Lilly going off into the world where I cannot protect her, but despite the absence of tears, I am emotionally affected. Last night I had a dream that I sent my three oldest children to Disneyland with a large group of strangers. It didn't occur to me that it was a bad idea until they were already gone. When they got back I asked if everyone was nice to them and they told me no. The deeper meaning is not hard to see.

You have never met two children who were this excited to start school. Lilly was visibly giddy. She is a giggly thing anyway, but last night after Shelby took her to buy a new Dora the Explorer backpack she came back beside herself. She had a hard time settling down for bed, but got up this morning very willingly and got ready in record time.

As is Rachel's nature, her excitement was a bit more subtle. When asked if she is excited for first grade, her eyes light up and she does her trademark coy smile and answers with a quiet "yes". Her teacher told her on back-to-school night that her only homework was to get a good night's sleep. Rachel obeyed and was out by eight. This never happens in Rachel's world. She is a night owl who likes to sleep in. Since her bus picks her up at the unreasonable hour of 6:50, hopefully she will be able to make a habit of going to sleep early.

Carson is quite enjoying this day without his sisters. Emilia is asleep, so he and I have the rare treat of being each other's sole companions. Still, it was almost ten o'clock before he realized the girls were missing. He asked were they were, and was not at all upset when I told them they would be gone for the day.

As sad as I am to see summer fun end, and as much as I dread having to once again wake up before the crack of dawn, it has been apparent over these past few weeks how very restless we were all becoming. There have been a lot of little fights, and even a few knock-down drag-outs. Most of the fights involved Rachel "just playing" with Carson or Lilly, who would in turn screech and squeal and cry, since neither of them thought of Rachel's man-handling as playing. As my tolerance waned, I found myself sending them downstairs to watch movies way more than I should have. This all made it easier to send them back to school.

For the record, Emmy had her 12-month check-up a couple of weeks ago. Yes it is true, my little baby is now a 1-year-old! The doctor says everything looks good, although she is excessively small. She weighed in at 17lbs, which puts her once again in the 1st percentile. No worries though. Dr. Hanks is unconcerned, and so am I. The kid eats like crazy, and is very happy and healthy. She can now say mom (although she almost never does), dad (her favorite word), uh-oh, and I swear she occasionally says "cat". She also has "tricks" that she will do, but not usually on command. She gives big slobbery kisses, waves, and claps. But my favorite thing is when she dances. I am always amazed at how innate the need to move to music is, and how young babies are when they start grooving to the beat.

It's Been A Long Time!



Cousin Camp



Well I totally gave up on blogging during the first part of the summer. We were having way too much summer fun to be bothered with responsibilities. It is time however, to get back into it. There has been so much happening these past few weeks that I am worried I have forgotten much of it. Let's see how we do.

Before I forget, we had a family summer weeding day on Tuesday. We insisted everyone help, much to Rachel's chagrin. Finally, after a little complaining she found her niche in telling Lilly what weeds to pull next. Both seemed to be enjoying this arrangement and we were all working harmoniously until Shelby said, "Rachel when you grow up I think you will be a supervisor." Rachel asked "What's a supervisor?" Shelby said, "It is someone who is in charge." Shortly after this, Rachel climbed up high on our garden fence and started shouting orders to all of us. I think we unleashed a monster!

Carson and Rachel have this little back and forth game they play where Carson taunts Rachel until she goes after him. Then he screams and cries when he gets caught. Well during one of these games, Carson poked Rachel with a fork on her hand. She was fine, but her heart was broken. I thought time-out was an appropriate punishment. Carson was less than happy about it because in his mind Rachel got what she deserved (he was probably right). Once time-out was over I made him apologize. Now remember, Carson has just started speaking fluently within the last few months. He very sternly looked at Rachel and said "Sorry poopy-head." I had to excuse myself for a few minutes before I could give him a lecture on how this was not an appropriate apology. Despite my efforts to hide it, he knew I was laughing so the whole thing became a joke to all of us. Except Rachel, who was still licking her literal and figurative wounds.

Neither Rachel or Lilly will let me put their hair in pigtails anymore. They say it is for babies. My heart is broken. Sometimes I beg them to let me do it, but they almost never give in. Rachel is uninterested in cartoons anymore and only wants to watch the Disney Channel with all the teenage shows on it. Maybe I am a mean mom, but I don't let her. I understand her desire to be a big kid, but I can see the little girl in her slipping away and it makes me sad. I don't want to rush it!

Lilly is a little human garbage disposal! She wants to eat all the time. I am not sure where she puts her massive amounts of food. She is such a tiny little thing! She told me on Wednesday that she was "freezing hungry". I asked her what that meant and she said "not freezing cold, just freezing hungry!"



Lilly's Birthday Party. From left to right: Lilly, Allison Millward,
Zylia, Rachel, Carson, Elizabeth Lackey



You know Lilly turned 5 last week. She had a decidedly great day. We had swim lessons in the morning. Afterwards I took her to McDonald's with Rachel and Elizabeth and I let her have a whole happy meal, as opposed to the burger (no meat) and water she usually gets. After that she got to have a small birthday party with 3 of her friends. She chose Elizabeth, Allison, and Zelya. "No boys" she told me, most decidedly. In the evening we had hot dogs for dinner and cake for dessert. I bought Lilly vegetarian hot dogs because she has given up on eating regular hot dogs. In case anyone is keeping track, that means absolutely no meat for Lilly. She didn't like the Veggie Dogs, and I don't blame her. They were yucky. Uncle Cody built a fire that night and pitched a tent. The kids and him roasted marshmallows and pretended to be camping. That is until bedtime. Then mom and dad felt it would be better for everyone if the kids slept in their own beds.



Emilia and Jude at Lidia's birthday party



Just a word about Emilia. She is delightful and talkative. I am almost positive she told me she loved me the other day. I can get her to mimic most sounds and some basic baby words. I think she will be an early talker. She is very very very sensitive to stimuli. Any little knock or bump sets her off crying, which is a problem in this house since knocks and bumps are how we roll. She likes to be either held by an adult, or left completely alone to explore without being approached by a child.

Ok now that business is taken care of , about our summer fun. So far we have swam and swam and swam. The library has been hit and miss, depending on whether we feel done with our previous books. For our field trips, we have visited the sand dunes (my favorite), Sandy Point (which the kids loved), and we attempted Birds Of Prey. BOP didn't work out because I was confused. So we ended up hiking and having lunch at the park instead. We will try again next week. I also took the kids to their first ever bowling trip.  Considering it was me, three small children, and one baby I think that one went pretty well. And last week my sister Summer organized a two-day fifties-themed cousin camp, also a huge success. Next week we are hiking in Idaho City. Laundry has been on the back burner, and my house will not win any awards for cleanliness. Sleep has been a matter of convenience. But we have been having fun, fun, fun!



Carson and Mom at sand dunes



Lilly, Rachel, Mom at sand dunes



Summertime

We had our first official summertime outing yesterday. Monday is library day, so we packed everyone up and headed out. I let each kid pick out two books, and then each week they take turns choosing a movie to take home. This is actually our third Monday in a row that we have hit the library, and I have to say so far it has been pretty smooth. I let the kids choose their books first, then they sit on the bean bags and read while I get my book. The only snag is when they all decide they have to go to the bathroom (which so far has been every time we go). The bathroom at the Nampa library is teeny tiny. Fitting four kids and a stroller in that little space is tricky, but we survive. After the library we went to Fruitland to hang out with cousins. In an attempt to keep life simple, we ate sandwiches for dinner. It was a wonderful day! Tuesdays are usually swimming days but it is only supposed to be 60 degrees today so we are bowling instead.

Oh, so the reason for the 60 degree weather is the horrible storm that passed through our area last night. I have never seen wind like that here. Of course our power went out right at bed time. All three of my older kids are scared of the dark (not to mention their mom a little bit). We let them "sleep" together, but it was after 10 before any of them wound down for the night. At one point I could hear them giggling downstairs, and I hollered at them to come upstairs so I could scold them. When I asked them what they were doing they said "We are making funny shadows on the wall." Well what kind of mom can yell at their kids for something like that? I am always telling them to get along, so I chose to embrace the evening where they did just that.

We keep losing broccoli and cabbage plants from our garden and have recently discovered that the culprit is gophers. Shelby was outside analyzing the problem with Lilly. Later when she came in she said "Mom, can gophers talk?" Not sure where this conversation was headed I said warily, "I don't think so....why do you ask?" Lilly said "If gophers can't talk, how is Dad going to teach them a lesson?" Given her feelings on animal cruelty, I have opted not to tell her how Dad is going to teach them a lesson.

So as of this morning, Emilia is officially crawling. She still seems a little hesitant, but there is definitely forward motion. Initially I was excited, but then I started thinking about the stairs and the cat food and the toilet, and all the other hazards/messes she is going to get into now that she is Mobile. Still, the girl is 10-months old. It was bound to happen eventually, and I had nearly a year of very little movement.

Where do kids learn "neener neener neener"? Certainly not from their parents. It is almost like an innate sound that every kid has in them. Carson has been doing this a lot lately, but he is still trying to get it right. Instead of his thumbs in his ears, he sticks his pointer fingers in and then says "Mo-om! Nee nee nee!" I hate to correct him because it is so stinking cute. It reminds me of when Lilly used to say "togwether" instead of together. Rachel taught her the right way to say it and I was so bummed.

Lilly keeps asking me who I love more, her or Jesus. Now you tell me, what would you say? Rachel has asked a few times, "Mom, which of your kids do you love most?" Then she sticks her hand out, palm facing me, and says "You can't say 'all of them.' You can't say that!" On the same subject, as I said before fairness is a big deal to my kids. So anytime it looks like one kid gets favored, I am questioned. For example "Why does Carson get the first one?" Or, "How come Lilly gets more than me?"I always say "Because I love him/her the most." I get some funny looks from people out in public for that one.

Bonfire

We woke up to our chicken coup ablaze last week around 4:30am. This is the coup where we keep the baby chicks not ready to transition to the big hen house. You know, the coup right by our bedroom window. I heard the chicks chirping wildly as I was in and out of sleep. When their chirping began to sound panicky I looked outside our bedroom window to see a light not quite like the sunrise. It only took a moment to realize it was a roaring fire. I have to tell you, in theory I do not do well with emergencies. I am easily rattled by the idea that harm might come to me or my family. But in the face of my first really dangerous situation I did great! The first thing I did was wake Shelby up. Next I ran outside to let the chicks out. In retrospect I should have gotten my kids away from that side of the house first, but it hadn't occurred to me that the fire might have reached the house as well by then. The chicks were huddled in the coolest part of the gated area outside the coup and I could not get them to exit. I finally pulled the fence up where they were and they escaped unharmed. Then I ran in to gather my kids just in case the fire spread to the house. Shelby in the mean time did the thing that never even crossed my mind. He worked on putting out the fire with the garden hose. Once my kids were safe I asked if we should call 911, but he assured me the flames were under control. My guy is such a man. We decided that between my instinct to save all living things, and his instinct to fight the danger we make a pretty good pair. Amazingly I was able to get back to sleep once there was no immediate threat. Shelby was not so lucky. He spent the rest of the night wide awake and keeping guard.

Carson poops pretty much exclusively in the toilet now. I know this is not the thing most people want to read about but it is big news to us. That means in the potty training department I have 3 down and one to go! In other Carson related news, I sent him to wash up for bed last night and then I got distracted with something else. Several minutes later, once there was peace and quiet upstairs, I heard the bathroom water running. When I went in, Carson was covered in bright pink lipstick (I have to say, not my lipstick. It belongs to the girls). He had it all over his face and hands. When I asked him what he was doing he said "Umm, washing mine hands." This morning he still has a smeary ring of pink lipstick all around his mouth. Luckily he is secure in his masculinity.

One of the hardest things about being a mom is dealing with fairness. My sense of equality is constantly under scrutiny. If I tell Carson I love him in front of Lilly, she insistsI tell her I love her too. While tucking in the girls, I do not hear the end of it if I spend more time with one than the other. This is an aspect of parenting I did not anticipate. For a few months now my response to questions like "Why did Rachel get the first one?" or "How come Carson got more than me?" is always "Because I love him/her more than you." That response has mostly lost its shock value at this point.

I am so excited for summer I can hardly stand it! I have scheduled out our summer fun on our calendar, but not in an attempt to be super type A (which I am not). Rather it is my way of making it a priority. Otherwise doctor appointments and other things will get in the way. So here it is in a nutshell. Mondays is library day, which will take place promptly after boot camp. Tuesdays is swimming day. If the weather does not permit, we will go bowling instead. I signed the kids up for a free bowling program this summer. On Wednesday we will do a craft. For those of you who may not be aware, I am not super crafty so this one scares me a little. I figure we can always paint rocks if nothing else. Thursday is field trip day, and I have a whole list of places to take them. Friday is free day because I think we will all be ready to chill by the end of the week. I am so excited!

P.S. I have photos but the computer is not cooperating. Stay tuned!

California

My grandfather's 95th birthday party was in California last weekend and I wanted to attend. After much consideration it was decided that I would take Emilia and drive there with my parents while Shelby stayed home with the other kids. We left bright and early Friday morning. When I went to wake Emilia up I was overwhelmed by a horrible stench coming from her crib. Initially I thought she had pooped but upon further inspection I realized she had thrown-up in the night and then slept in it all night. As a side note, I will never understand how kids can throw up in their sleep, roll over and continue to snooze in a pile of their own vomit. Anyway it was a rough start to a very rough 13 hour drive. My kids have all been good travellers as babies to varying degrees. Rachel was the best. She could be in a car for hours and we would not hear a peep. Emilia has a very poor track record so far. I thought having me sit by her would help but it only made her mad. She probably thought I was being a jerk for just sitting there instead of getting her out of her car seat. During the course of the car ride she threw up once, had one blow out diarrhea diaper, let out periodic high pitch screeches (I am talking frequent blood-curdling screams), and cried for the last solid 2 hours of the car ride. My dad's cousin Fay rode with us and apparently nobody told her we were bringing a baby. She said when she got in the car that she loves babies, but I wonder if by the end she changed her mind. The rest of the trip Emilia was pretty good, and I was happy to have a child with me. It helped me miss the others less. The ride home was significantly more peaceful, probably because by then she was feeling much better.

While I was gone the kids were great for Shelby. Part of me was hoping they would make things a little difficult for him as to evoke some feelings of appreciation for what I do all day. Carson apparently pooped only in the toilet the whole time, something he had rarely done up to that point. The girls were nice and well-behaved, and they all had fun together. The minute I got back Carson regressed to strictly pooping in his pants again. Usually when I return from a trip my kids all try to be difficult, maybe to punish me for leaving? The day after I got back was a perfect mother day. The kind that makes me just love my life. Shelby left me with a pretty clean house, so I did not have much house work to do. The weather was nice, and other than the pooping thing, all the kids were pleasant. I wish every day was that good!

I asked Lilly to get me the mail the other day. She went to the mailbox without her shoes and ended up with three giant slivers. She wanted more than anything to leave them in her foot for life, but they had to come out. Getting them out was an all day traumatic process for both of us. Every time I touched her foot she would scream that it hurt and pull away. So we made a deal. She promised she would hold still if I promised not to use a skeedle (needle). We tried tweezers and fingernails, but Lilly was not keeping her end of the bargain. She would not let me anywhere near the slivers before she kicked and screamed and wiggled away. I gave her periodic breaks but it did not help. Finally in desperation I grabbed a needle, held her down and removed the first sliver. I am sure my neighbors considered calling child protective services, such were the screams. After the first sliver she asked me if we could just please talk about it. I sat her on my lap and she told me through her tears how if she had only been wearing shoes none of this would have happened, and how there wasn't even any mail in the mailbox, and could we please just leave the slivers in. By the end of the conversation we were both crying. But the slivers had to come out. So I held her down and removed the last two slivers while trying to tune out her screaming.

Emilia had an appointment with her cardiologist yesterday. I wasn't sure I would make it back in time to get Rachel from the bus, so I left Lilly and Carson with Amber and on a whim, picked Rachel up from school early so she could come with me. I wanted to spend some time with her and thought it would make her feel special. Now that she is getting older it is fun to talk to her about more grown-up stuff. Of course she is still mostly child. She has been talking about getting a magic wand for a few weeks. She even prays for it, but to no avail. In the car yesterday she told me she was just going to get a magic horse instead. That way her magic horse can make her a magic wand. Sounds logical, right? I asked her if I could ever ride her magic horse and after thinking for a minute she said "I will just have my magic horse make you your own magic horse." the other conversation we had: "Rachel, what is your least favorite color?" Rachel answers a definite "Red." A little surprised I respond "Why red?" She tells me "All the bad guys are red. My least favorite number is four because it is everywhere and it freaks me out." I said "interesting" but in my mind I was thinking "Weird".

No Time

As you may have noticed my blog posts have become much less frequent in the last couple of months. The reason is simple. I am busy. We have a lot going on in our little world from day to day. The thing is, the busier I am, the more I have to blog about. It is difficult to remember everything but I will do my best.

I love listening to Carson talk. He puts so much emphasis in everything he says. For example he never greets me with a simple "Hello". It is always "(Gasp) Hiii mom!" Even if he saw me 5 minutes earlier in some other room. Other Carson-speak: "Ooh..Mom those are bit (big) mountains! We go to the mountains please?" My answer, "No we have to take Rachel to karate." His response, "Please! I promise, please!" Why "I promise" I don't know. He says it anytime he wants something that I say no to. It may have its roots in him watching me try and put the girls in time-out. They used to bargain with "Please mom, I promise I won't do it again!" Also Carson calls ear wax "ear poop". The other day he said "Mom, there's poop in mine ear!" In the car the other day Rachel asked if I like animals and I said I do. Carson said "I hate animals!" Now before you grow to be concerned remember he does not fully understand the word hate. And he loves animals. I said "Carson that isn't very nice." As if to try and justify his hate for animals he said "I don't hate you. And I don't hate Daddy. And I don't hate Lilly." Rachel interjected to find out if he hates her, which he says he doesn't. When I get after him for not doing something I asked him to do he says "mo-om I a-am!" Which he might as well add "duh" to the end of it.

Lilly is officially registered for kindergarten. Mostly I cannot believe it, yet at the same time it seems like she was born ready. At the screening she aced everything except cutting on a squiggly line. I'm not surprised since Rachel is the keeper of scissors at our house. She likes to be in charge and Lilly usually falls in line. Another notable Lilly thing is her rock collection. Wherever she goes Lilly is on the lookout for pretty rocks. Her favorite are the teeny tiny ones that only people 3 feet tall are close enough to the ground to see. She likes to give them to me as gifts. As a result her and I have perpetually gravel-filled pockets.

I thought I had nipped the whole swearing thing in the bud with Lilly, and I guess I had. Rachel blindsided me however when she couldn't figure out how to use the keyboard and said "What the hell?" I have really got to start tuning into what my kids are hearing.

Emilia had her 9 month checkup yesterday. The girl is an eater like you wouldn't believe, but apparently all that food is going straight to her long skinny legs. Emilia is in the first percentile for weight and the 100th percentile for height. That is a first for our kids. Usually we are on the bottom of the chart for both. Other than the constant blood curdling screaming she makes us all endure, she is doing great. The doctor says her heart sounds uninteresting. Fantastic!

I love my kids. Some days I like them more than others. Yesterday I had the stomach flu. The smart thing for a person to do in this situation is to throw a movie on to entertain the kids while she sleeps on the couch. But before I got sick I had already made a plan for the day, and I was determined to stick with it. Emilia had her doctors appointment, and since we are into conserving gas (at $3.75 a gallon, who isn't?), we were going to hit the grocery store right afterwards for some serious grocery shopping. Rachel was feeling green as well, so she was pretty much out of it. Lilly was so distraught by all the attention Rachel was getting for feeling sick that she claimed to be sick too. What came next was a series of over-emotional meltdowns at the slightest provocation on Lilly's part. Does anyone remember how old Carson is? That's right, he is three. Three-year-olds listen great. The first half of the shopping trip I made him sit in the cart much to his serious dismay. After watching him stand on my apples and scream "lemme out!" for the ninth time, I let him walk. Supposedly with the stipulation that he stays close to me. Did I mention that he is three? Oh and remember that doctor's appointment for Emilia? She got shots of course so she was not in the best of moods either. She did fine as long as I was standing right in front of her, but the minute we could not make direct eye contact she started in on the screaming. Probably they were not all that bad, but remember I had the stomach flu. Everything seemed about 10 times harder. I don't like to use this blog to unload, but I think my children should someday be able to look back at some of these posts and recognize the sacrifices I made for them...right?